Thursday, December 22, 2011

25 Questions: Christmas Style

I am stealing this from Lisa. Considering the fact we are sisters, some of the answers are the same.

25 Questions: Holiday Style

Eggnog or hot chocolate?
Hot chocolate. I’ve never had egg nog, but it just does not sound appealing to me at all. I prefer Swiss Miss hot chocolate with 2 French Vanilla creamers in a cup of coffee.

Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree?
It depends on if it's big or small. Big things I will probably leave unwrapped under the tree.

Colored lights on tree/house or white?
I have done both. I always think I want to do all white, but I just like the randomness of the colors.

Do you hang mistletoe?
I don’t. And I actually don’t know anyone who does.

When do you hang your decorations up?
It's been so long since I have had my own house that I don't even remember. It's definitely after Thanksgiving though.

What is your favorite holiday dish (excluding dessert)?
That’s an easy one. My Grandma’s homemade noodles. She rolls them out herself and makes them every year before Thanksgiving. If we’re lucky, we get some on Christmas too. When I was pregnant with Lexi she taught us how to make them, but I've never attempted it on my own.

Favorite holiday memory as a child?
I have so many. My sisters and I used to try to stay up all night playing games on Christmas Eve. And take turns creeping down the stairs to see if Santa had come yet.
We and our cousins used to sing songs and make up little plays to perform for our parents.
My uncle Steve used to dress up like Santa and come visit us.
Going to Grandma Eva's every year on Christmas Day after getting up early and opening gifts.
Really, I could go on and on.
So many memories.
What is on your Christmas wish list?

Things that no one can buy me. Like to have the closing on the house over with.
I would love to have a keurig, but it isn't really practical right now.

Do you open a gifts on Christmas Eve?
No. I have been buying Lexi Christmas Eve pajamas, so maybe I will start wrapping those and let her open them on Christmas Eve? And maybe a new book?

How do you decorate your Christmas tree?
Our Christmas ornaments started out Red and Blue and have gathered a few others over the years. At mom and dad's they are all ornaments gathered from 28 years of marriage.

Snow? Love it or dread it?
Love Love Love it! I love the way it looks. I love to walk around and play in it.

Real tree or fake tree?
Real. There’s just no comparison.

Do you remember your favorite gift?
My mom always has made Christmas really special for us, so I'm sure there was something every year that could qualify as the best gift ever.

What’s the most important thing about Christmas for you?
I get all sappy and emotional this time of year just thinking about how lucky I am. It all stems back to the birth of Jesus, and how we wouldn't have the life we have without his birth and death. But I have the greatest family ever and I am such a lucky lucky person.

Favorite Dessert:
Um….any and all? Haha. I love desserts. Literally anything sweet.

What is your favorite tradition?
Christmas Eve Eve with my cousins. We pick one of our houses and all stay the night. We always find something fun to do together. Also, getting up early to open presents on Christmas morning.

What tops your tree?
This year it's a woven looking star. It's pretty cute!

Do you prefer giving or receiving?
Giving. That sounds cheesy, but I just love to buy things for people. I get so excited after I buy something that I know someone will like, that I have a really hard time not telling them what I bought them.

What is your favorite Christmas song?
Anything traditional and of the country variety.

Candy canes, yuck or yum?
Yum! I love them.

Favorite Christmas movie?
Home Alone 1 and 2. You can’t go wrong with the classic tale of a kid getting revenge on a couple of robbers. (We’re going to pretend like Home Alone 3 never happened).

What do you leave for Santa?
We used to leave him cookies and milk.

Do you have a Christmas morning tradition?
My dad has to be at work early on Christmas (he’s a rancher) so that he can be off by noon to go to my Grandma’s for lunch, so we get up super early and open presents. We all pick a spot on the dining room floor and pass out presents and then open them together. This will always and forever be Christmas to me.

Do you prefer to shop on-line or at the mall?
The older I get, the more I would LOVE to buy everything online. I just don't like the hustle and bustle and how crazy and rude people get.

Christmas letter or Christmas card?
Cards. Once Lexi gets a little older I will probably start doing a letter. Maybe next year since we will have a new house in January (hopefully) and that will be something to report on.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Becoming home buyers

I am going to try to blog more in hopes to get more followers. If you like what you see please "follow" me on google friend connect, and tell your friends to come check me out.
We are in the process of buying our very own home. We have lived with my parents for a year while we were getting back on our feet. Thankfully my job finally transitioned to permanent status, so we have been able to save up some money. I am so thankful for this home they have given us and Lexi.
About the new house:
It is a doublewide trailer, which I've learned some people don't consider a house, but oh well. The house is amazing. It is a foreclosure home so we have a few more hoops to jump through, than just a normal buy. We originally placed an offer on the house and were denied. We didn't make a counteroffer at that time. We looked at a few more places, but our minds just kept coming back to this house. So we decides to place a second, higher offer. And it was accepted! The seller has been giving us the runaround on some things but we are sticking to our guns, and doing what we know is best. The inspections are supposed to start today. We have had to cancel them twice because of issues on the seller's end. We have had to file for an extension on the 10 days to get inspections done. Because of unforseen issues and the Thanksgiving holiday we have run out of time. We are in love with our realtor and Lexi calls him Uncle Chad. She asks to go see him all the time. The house has been vacant for about 3 years. It has been winterized, but we are telling ourselves that it will be perfectly normal to have something leak when they run the water back on. There are some things already noticed that will need repaired before the inspection will pass, but we have some money built in for repairs. We purchased our appliances this weekend, so that makes it a little more real. Once these inspections are through I will feel a little more at ease about the whole thing. It is definitely a process I don't want to go through very often.New

Monday, November 28, 2011


Thanksgiving was once again amazing. My family never ceases to amaze me. We do holidays right! Here's a list of the food we had: turkey, ham, my Grandma's homemade noodles, broccoli rice casserole, hot corn casserole, homemade rolls, sweet potatoes, pies, mashed potatoes and gravy, stuffing...i'm probably missing a bunch of stuff. Highlights of the day. Getting to see my sisters that I don't see enough. Getting to see my cousins who I don't see enough. Throwing a hot roll across the room to my uncle. Lexi being adorable the whole day. Lexi riding my cousin's old rocking horse. Me wearing 2 different shoes. Lexi telling uncle JR "Go pokes!" and "No boomer." My uncle Mike giving Lexi some stuffed animals, including a huge Mickey Mouse that came from Disney land. Uncle Mike has finally started to open up around kids more. When he and my Aunt Claudia got married there were already 5 kids in the family. He was very standofish. Not huggy or touchy feely. So to see him play with Lexi makes my heart happy!
Friday was Jacob's side of the family's thanksgiving. I finally convinced Jacob's mom that everyone needed to being a dish. Previously she had cooked the entire meal by herself...crazy huh! So I got the honor of cooking the turkey. I was terrified because I have never cooked a turkey before. And my mom was not going to be here to help me. But I followed a combination of instructions and cooked him in my mom's electric roaster. SO EASY! I must buy one of those when we move out. Also for dinner we had ham, sweet potato casserole (it was like dessert. Had an apple crisp like topping!) stuffing, corn, green beans, and more that I am missing. It was another amazing meal. I love going to Jacob's side of the family because there are kids Lexi's age to play with. She loves to play with her cousins. And even though they are a few years older than her she just follows them around and is part of the gang. She melted my heart when we were leaving and she said, "I wanna stay at pawpaw's house." Such a sweet girl.
Today I am home in bed with the flu. Fun times here, so don't come too close!

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Friday Phone Dump

This is going to be my first time doing this, and naturally I'm a couple days late.

But here goes nothing.

Saturday, October 8, 2011

Letter to Lexi 10/3/11

You are so grown up and so smart!
You keepo me on my toes wondering what new thing you will say today.
You go to school with Daddy and you love it so much.
You love to read, just like Mommy and Daddy and it makes us so happy.
We haven't gotten potty training down yet, but like everything else, I know you will do it on YOUR time!
You like to wake up early and yell until someone brings you to our bed, but Mommy loves your cuddles.
You can count all the way to 10. You know most of your ABC's but mix up the order. Your new favorite song is wheels on the bus. Daddy added "the Lexi's on the bus go Yay Yay Yay!" and that is your favorite part of the song. You can pick out certain numbers and letters when you see them. When the Channel 6 news comes on you always say "Homa Homa!" (Oklahoma)
You love to color and are starting to stay in the lines more. You love puzzles and Barbies.
Your new favorite show is Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. That's the only show Poppy could find on tv one morning and you were immediately in love.
Lexi you are so loving and compassionate. A few weeks ago I was sick. You climbed in bed, patted me, and say "it's ok sissy." We very rarely have to punish you because just raising our voices hurts your feelings. You almost immediately stop, cry, get in Daddy's lap and seek his forgiveness.
Your strong will and attitude reminds me of myself.
You love sports, especially your OSU Cowboys. You love Pistol Pete and are so quick to throw up your pistols and give anyone you meet a "Go Pokes!"
During baseball season your favorites were Yadi and Berkman. I looked all over and couldn't find you a Cardinals shirt.
Lexi, I hope you always know how much I love you! You are my special miracle and I thank God every day foryou. I continuously wonder who you are going to become. Will you play sports, band, show animals? Or just be a diva princess?!
You teach me how to love with my whole heart and how to be loved in return!
Love you bunches and bunches!

Monday, August 15, 2011

14 and 4

It's a weird title, but stick with me.
14 years ago today I lost my Papa Judd. I can't believe it has been that long. I remember that day perfectly. He was my first Grandparent to pass away. Let me tell you how it happened.
Papa had been sick and in the hospital for a while. Since they live 4 hours away, we weren't able to go and visit him often enough.
I remember that it was the first week of school. The first week of my 8th grade year. I remember being in English class. I got a call to bring my stuff to the office. When I got there Grandma Eva was waiting for me with my sisters. She said she was taking us home. I didn't know what was going on, but I knew it wasn't good. My parents would never just pull us out of class. When we got home we found out that we were making the 4 hour drive to see Papa because he wasn't going to last much longer.
I remember going to the hospital and everyone being there. I remember we got to go in and talk to him even though he wasn't awake. I remember the nurses coming in and out crying as they left. He had a way of impacting everyone that he met.
At some point several of us left to go get something to eat for dinner. I don't remember where we went, but it seems like the table we sat at was one of those with a booth on one side and chairs on the other.
When we got back to the hospital my uncles (my Mom's brothers) were waiting for us outside. At that moment, everything changed. They told us that Papa had passed while we were gone. My 2 aunts automatically fell down in the parking lot crying and screaming. While my mom just hugged my Uncle Russell and cried. I remember him saying "it's weird how me and you are so much alike."
We went back up to his room. We all got to go back in one more time. I remember trying to hold myself together. But everytime I was able to control the tears someone would say, "he loved you so much" and I would lose it again.
I remember being so mad when the chaplain came to pray with us because he kept calling him Howard when his name was Howell. How could he not get his name right?!I don't remember anything about that night after that.
I remember my Grandma going to the funeral home every day to see him. When we had his viewing the whole family got to just sit and tell stories about Papa. I think his brother said something about him looking like he could sit up at any minute and ask us why we were all crying. He did look much better than he had in several months.
I remember the night before the funeral Grandma was really upset. I remember her saying "I won't be able to go see him anymore." I don't remember the funeral. And I don't remember the burial. That's probably for the best.
I miss him every day. I wish he could have met Jacob. And I wish Lexi could sit on his lap. He would love all the great grandchildren he has now.
4 years ago today I lost my Uncle Steve. I also can't believe it has been 4 years that he has been gone. He was a great man.
He used to always dress up as Santa for the parades and festivities in their town. We have home video of him coming into the house dressed as Santa handing out candycanes. It's so funny because all of us older kids knew it was him, but it was so special and fun.
On my wedding day, after driving 4 hours, he went and got me and my bridesmaids something to eat for lunch. I will never forget that.
He used to poke his tongue out when he was working on something. Lexi does it now, and I always call her Uncle Steve. I can't wait until I can tell her about him someday.
Mom called me late that night. When the phone rings in the middle of the night I go into panic mode, because people don't call me in the middle of the night. When I answered, mom immediately told me to wake up Jacob. I remember saying why. She said just do it. So, I woke him up. She told me that Uncle Steve had died. I think I asked how and she said she didn't know. I couldn't sleep for the rest of the night. I kept tossing and turning, waking up thinking it had to be a dream.
When I packed my bags to leave I threw in an OSU shirt. As I did, I smiled. Because he was a huge OU fan, I knew he would be giving me heck for wearing an orange shirt. We drove like hell to get there the next day. But when we got there I found myself not knowing what to do. I knew I would have to face Aunt Valerie, and I had no idea what I could say to her. I walked in and immediately went to my mom and buried my face in her shoulder. By the time I got to Aunt Valerie I was already crying. Then came the "he loved you so much."
I remember sitting in Aunt Valerie's house while people streamed in and out. The thing I will never forget is how strong she was through the whole thing. People would come in crying and she would comfort them. I don't know how she did it. She is an amazing woman.
His service was beautiful, and as they carried the casket out of the church Boomer Sooner was playing. He went from the church to the cemetary in the back of a firetruck. He would have loved that.
I do wish Lexi could have met her Uncle Steve. He loved kids, and he would have a blast with all these great nieces and nephews he has now.
It's hard on a day like today to focus on work. To focus on anything except for grief. But everytime I felt the tears coming today I said a quick prayer for Grandma Judd, because she lost her husband. For Aunt Valerie, because she lost her father and her husband. For Steven and Derek, because they lost their Papa and their father. It helped me to stay focused. It also helped me to know that I wasn't alone in my grief today. I know that my whole family is hurting today.
They have taught me to not take anything for granted. We are never promised a tomorrow. Tell people that you love them. Let them know how much you care!

Monday, June 20, 2011

Father's Day

Let's talk about Fathers. I truly believe I have the best Dad in the whole world. Now it wasn't always the breezy relationship we have now. When I was a teenager I pushed the limits. My can't push her...she will snap, and it will not be pretty. (Sound familiar? Lexi and i have the same attitude!) But with Dad, i could push and push and push. Looking back i don't understand it. I still cannot hear the song "Daddy's Hands" without tearing up thinking of my own Dad. He was tough when he needed to be and soft when he needed to be. He always told us when we were in the wrong, but he also praised us when we were right. We have pictures of him sitting in the kiddie pool with his cut off denim shorts, letting us pour buckets of water on him. When we were young he built us a sandbox. Talk about amazing! As he and i were getting ready to walk down the aisle at my wedding he knew i was nervous. He looked down at me and said, "are you ready to do this?" I was ready to marry the love of my life, but i still needed my Daddy by my side. He used to jump on the trampoline with us. And fly kites. He is an amazing Dad!The next Dad on my list is my Grandpa Gleason. We call him Papa, everyone else calls him James or Jimmy. He is truly amazing. It melts my heart to see Lexi climb up on his lap and read him a book. I know it melts his heart too.Next, Jacob, my amazing husband, the Father to 3 angels and 1 beautiful little girl. You always know how much you love your husband, right? Wrong! You never know how much you love your husband until you see him site over you while you're pregnant. And then that love multiplies again when you see him hold your baby for the first time. See, i was unconscious for several hours after delivery. Lexi went to the NICU. The nurses had to make Jacob go with her. He didn't want to leave me. He spent the whole early morning chauffeuring people to see Lexi. The video footage Mom took of Jacob talking to Lexi makes me tear up just thinking about it. It was amazing!Grandpa Judd: He's been gone too long. But i will never forget the time we shared. He used to tell the best jokes. We didn't get to see him much, so he doted over us when we were there. I miss him so much. And it breaks my heart that Jacob never got to meet him. They would have loved each other. I also am sad that Lexi can never jump up in his lap. But maybe she got to meet him on the other side.All my uncles: We have a huge family. We are all very close. My uncles have been more like "extra dads" to me.I hope, not only yesterday, but every day of the year they know how special they are!

Monday, May 9, 2011

Mother's Day...and infertility

Mother's Day always brings a flood of emotions for me. I was lucky to have been raise in a wonderful family. I have my mom, but also my Grandma's. Now I have Jacob's Mom, and his Grandma.
Back before I had Lexi, Mother's Day was just another slap in the face to an infertile. It hurt!
Now that I have's another day to be thankful. But, at the same time, yesterday I couldn't stop thinking the what ifs. What if I didn't have her? What if I was still infertile? What if, what if, what if... Not just that, but I also couldn't stop thinking of my CO sisters who are still battling infertility. Because it isn't fair. I have always been the kind of person that would much rather experience the pain, than someone else go through it. So, I can't help but think, Why am I so blessed to have a child? Why can't they have a child of their own? Also, why are there so many people that have kids and don't realize how truly blessed they are? I just can't stop questioning God. I know it's a problem. I know it's something I shouldn't do. I know there are some things that I will never understand...but I want to!
Jacob and I had a random conversation in the car a few weeks ago. One of those times where I spouted out my true feelings, tears and all, at a really weird time. We were talking about Kristin getting married and how she wants to have kids. I was saying how she had mentioned that she has the feeling she might have PCOS. This thought haunts me. Like I said before, I would much rather it be me than either one of my sisters. Because then I can handle it. They can't have PCOS, they can't have infertility, they can't have miscarriages. Because I can't handle it. I can't take control of the situation. If I have it, it's OK...not them. Jacob reminded me that it's not OK that I have it. It's not OK that I had miscarriages. It's not OK. But, if I had to pick...I would pick me.
I don't want to let myself think about it too much...because again, it's one of those things I can't control, that I don't have the answers to. But, the studies are there. PCOS is genetically linked. The chance is there, that one or both of my sisters could have it. Both of my dad's sisters had miscarriages with no diagnosed cause. Did/do they have PCOS? I don't know. They don't know. Chances are...they probably do. I have solice in the fact that my sisters have passed the age where I started having major PCOS related they don't have it right?! But, I've done too much research. I know too many people who have been diagnosed later in life.
What does this boil down to? Infertility isn't fair. I beg you to always, always remember the people in your life who are "Mothers in waiting." They have it tough enough as it is...without having to be forgotten on a special day.